White House Announces New Strategy for ‘Iran Beyond Control’: Pretending It’s Fine
Amid fears of Iran slipping beyond control, the White House unveils a new strategy: complete and utter denial,…
Trump’s ‘Coalition of the Willing’ to Reopen Strait of Hormuz Consists Solely of Self
President Trump struggled to build a Strait of Hormuz coalition, reportedly seeking advice from trophies and his…
Trump Escapes ‘Escalation Trap’ by Inventing a Bigger, Shinier One
President Trump freed himself from 'Trump's escalation trap' by creating a larger, more complex international…
Americas Shield Summit Unveils Literal, Unwieldy Cardboard Barrier
At the Shield of the Americas Summit, leaders unveiled a colossal cardboard barrier, hailed as impenetrable…
Trump Bans Anthropic from Gov’t After AI Refuses to Call Him ‘Glorious Leader’
Donald Trump announced a ban on Anthropic from US government use after its AI refused to generate unhinged…
Punk In The Park Cancels All 2026 Events Amidst Political Fallout
Punk In The Park canceled all 2026 events due to backlash over owner's Trump donation. Organizers cite political…
Judge Finds Third-Country Deportation Unlawful, Administration Seeks *Any* Country
A federal judge ruled the Trump administration’s third-country deportation policy unlawful. The White House is…
General Praised for Masterful Balancing Act Amidst Trump’s Iran Threats
General Milley's skillful balancing act prepares for Iran war while appeasing Trump's tweets.
Dead Kennedys Book Punk In The Park ’26 To Protest Owner’s Trump Support
Dead Kennedys will play Punk In The Park ’26 to protest owner's Trump support, turning the festival into a protest.
Trump Promises Data Center Energy Deals, Demands Tech Firms Build Power Plants
Trump plans to broker data center energy deals, demanding Big Tech finance their own power plants to protect…