Politics
5 Rules of Engagement for the Modi and Xi Meeting
Global leaders establish strict rules for the Modi and Xi meeting to prevent accidental friendship and maintain proper geopolitical tension.
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Politics
Fictional political satire inspired by real headlines. All quotes and events are entirely made up.
Politics
Pentagon PR Chiefs Draft Special Script For Donald Trump 25th Anniversary Address
Leaked Pentagon memo reveals the extreme protocols designed for the Donald Trump 25th anniversary address to keep him on message.
Politics
Disingenuous Mapping Rules Force Missouri Lawmakers To Use Real Math
Leaked memo reveals state lawmakers are struggling to cope with new disingenuous mapping rules that ban imaginary boundaries.
Politics
Rhode Island Primary Meltdown Exposed in Shocking Court Testimony
A shocking court transcript reveals how political consultants manipulated the recent Rhode Island primary for fun and profit.
Politics
Missouri Recalls Defiant 2022 Congressional Map Due To Choking Hazard
Federal regulators have issued a recall for the Missouri 2022 congressional map, citing severe choking hazards and jagged edges.
Politics
How To Spend Your Obamacare Rebate Check In Style
Get ready to spend your Obamacare rebate with our official guide to the most absurd ways to blow your federal windfall.
Politics
$5,000 Payment Promise Triggers Immediate Corporate Restructuring
Leaked internal memo reveals House Democrats' strategy to fight the $5,000 payment promise by praising the spiritual benefits of poverty.
Politics
Rhode Island Recalls Governor Dan McKee Following Severe Performance Defects
Regulators issued a recall for the Rhode Island Governor Dan McKee model after catastrophic primary defects left users with a complete loss of power.
Politics
Trump Promises $5,000 Payout in Giant Cardboard Check If GOP Wins
Donald Trump promised a $5,000 payout if Republicans win the midterms, but officials warn the money will arrive on giant novelty checks.
Politics
Trump Midterm $5,000 Promise Requires Massive Budget Reductions
Leaked memo reveals how federal agencies will fund the Trump midterm $5,000 promise through drastic, absurd budget cuts.
Politics
Missouri Redistricting Chaos Reaches Outer Space
State officials proudly expand the Missouri redistricting chaos to include the Andromeda galaxy in a bold new map.
Politics
Israel Denials Memo Shows Netanyahu Denies Having Ever Been Warned
Leaked memo outlines how Israel denials dictate that Benjamin Netanyahu cannot biologically receive warnings of any kind.
Politics
GOP Midterm Convention Memo Demands Staff Refer To All Candidates As Trump
A leaked memo from the GOP midterm convention reveals that staff must refer to all political candidates as Trump to keep the crowd excited.
Politics
Missouri Map Recalled After High Levels of Gerrymandering Detected
Federal safety regulators issue a mandatory recall of the Missouri map after detecting dangerously high levels of partisan gerrymandering.
Politics
Federal Recall Issued For New Hampshire Primary Results After Widespread Software Glitch
Regulators have issued a recall on New Hampshire primary results due to a major software malfunction in the state's democracy.
Politics
Trumpapalooza Midterm Convention Features Giant Water Slide Shaped Like Donald Trump
The Trumpapalooza midterm convention kicks off in Texas with a massive three-story water slide shaped like Donald Trump.
Politics
Missouri Congressional Map Chaos Revealed in Secret Court Transcript
Leaked court transcripts reveal the Missouri congressional map chaos is actually just state officials drawing districts using a box of crayons.
Politics
New Jersey Ghosting Protocol Memo Sent to All Campaign Staffers
A leaked internal memo reveals the official New Jersey ghosting protocol used by campaign staff to handle difficult constituent complaints.