Music
Mesh Announce Debut Album ‘No Fun At All’ To Universal Acclaim
Mesh’s debut album ‘No Fun At All’ is out, offering abrasive sounds for the existentially weary. Critics call it ‘terrifying.’
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Satirical news and absurd commentary on the music industry, artists, charts and everything in between.
Music
Saul Williams’ ‘Leaf Life’ Album Grows Into Existential Dread
Saul Williams announces new album ‘Leaf Life,’ featuring Robert Del Naja and Kamasi Washington. The project explores existential themes, promising an ‘organic sonic progression.’
Music
Finland’s PM Lost Due to Unapproved Sauna Towel Choice
Many asked why Finland’s PM lost. The answer was simple: her unapproved sauna towel choice. Voters demanded traditional patterns, analysts confirmed.
Music
Shannon Lay’s “Horizons” Reaches New, Unfathomable Depths of Calm
Shannon Lay’s new single “Horizons” is so calm, listeners are reporting spontaneous naps and intense relaxation. A new peak in sonic somnolence.
Music
Pulp’s Rise to Fame Celebrated in New Documentary
New film documents Pulp’s incredible rise to fame. Director Garth Jennings captures the band’s early days and lasting legacy.
Music
James Murphy & Questlove DJ Phish Fest, Fans Demand Explanations
Phish fans faced an existential dance-off as news broke that James Murphy & Questlove Are DJing Phish’s Mexican Resort Festival, sparking confusion and profound self-reflection.
Music
Pulp Announces Live Album And Film, Confirming They Did Indeed Encore
Pulp announced a new live album and film, ‘Pulp: What Do You Do For An Encore,’ confirming their recent reunion shows were not a fluke.
Music
Clutter Announce Debut Album Sugar Rush, Band Confirms It Exists
Stockholm band Clutter announced their debut album, Sugar Rush. The band confirmed it exists and contains songs.
Music
Converge Announce Saddest Day 2026 Lineup To Maximize Regional Melancholy
Converge’s Saddest Day 2026 festival lineup aims for maximum regional melancholy with acts like Chat Pile and Cave In.
Music
Squirrel Flower Announces ‘Say A Prayer To The Gods Of Getting Going,’ Hopes Someone Hears
Squirrel Flower’s new album, ‘Say A Prayer To The Gods Of Getting Going,’ features ‘Reelin” and a plea for divine motivation. Will it help anyone get going?
Music
Grammy Category Expansion Ensures Every Artist Wins a Trophy
The Recording Academy announced a massive Grammy category expansion, adding 37 new awards. These range from ‘Best R&B Collaboration’ to ‘Most Enthusiastic Kazoo Solo,’ ensuring every artist gets a tro
Music
Nettspend and OsamaSon Announce Joint Project, ‘NXO’
Nettspend and OsamaSon tease ‘NXO’ album. Fans brace for sonic chaos, speculate on joint tour. A true digital rap event.
Music
Olivia Rodrigo Admits Yacht Rock Is Not Her Vibe
Olivia Rodrigo revealed she doesn’t like yacht rock. She prefers ’80s new wave sadness’ instead. This admission surprised fans.
Music
Sha Ray, DJ Haram Drop 'Critical Thot' Album, Confirm Thotting Is Critical
Sha Ray and DJ Haram’s new album ‘Critical Thot’ is out now. Critics are baffled by its profound analysis of thot culture.
Music
Artist Drops Quavo Lawsuit Over Ferrari Sculpture, Cites Creative Differences
Artist Daniel Arsham dropped lawsuit against Quavo over Ferrari sculpture use. Claimed rapper unlocked art’s true potential. Sculpture reportedly felt understood.
Music
Taylor Swift’s ‘I Knew It, I Knew You’ Hits No. 1 Amidst Existential Crisis
Taylor Swift’s ‘I Knew It, I Knew You’ hits No. 1. Fans say they ‘knew it’ would happen, sparking debate on psychic abilities vs. marketing genius.
Music
Cold Court’s Final Single ‘Cola’ Leaves Listeners Thirsty for More
Cold Court’s final single, ‘Cola,’ offers shredded piano and Justice-like synths, leaving fans thirsty for more from the breakup-bound band.
Music
Madonna, Sabrina Carpenter Crowned ‘Queens of the Nightclub’ in New Video
Madonna and Sabrina Carpenter are the ‘Queens of the Nightclub’ in a new video. A holographic Carol Channing officiates.