Music
Rhododendron Album ‘Ascent Effort’ Promises Like Spitting Out Copper
Rhododendron’s new single ‘Like Spitting Out Copper’ is a challenging proggy metallic shapeshifter. Fans prepare for the full ‘Ascent Effort’ album.
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Music
Satirical news and absurd commentary on the music industry, artists, charts and everything in between.
Music
Girl Trouble Announce First New Album In 23 Years, Still Trouble
Girl Trouble is back with their first album in 23 years, ‘As Is,’ proving their loud, chaotic sound is here to stay.
Music
Roland Orzabal Announces Memoir, Declares His Life Is A Tearful Affair
Roland Orzabal’s memoir, ‘Welcome To Your Life,’ promises deep dives into Tears For Fears history. He details his solo efforts and songwriting process.
Music
Tisza Party Sweeps Hungary, Promises Every Citizen A Free Canoe
Hungary’s Tisza party won a two-thirds majority, promising a canoe to every citizen. The nation braced for a future of aquatic commuting and questionable government spending.
Music
Finland PM Loss Linked to National Silence Crisis
Finland PM loss for Sanna Marin was linked to voter dissatisfaction with perceived national noise levels, not policy, according to new data.
Music
TV Star’s ‘The Package’ Is A Portal To A Less Complicated Time
TV Star’s new song ‘The Package’ is a 90s time capsule. Its alt-rock sound is bringing back flannel and dial-up.
Music
Pond Announce New Album Terrestrials Amidst Existential Dinosaur Crisis
Pond announced their new album Terrestrials, inspired by dinosaurs. Band members experienced literal neck-growing during recording.
Music
Teenage Sturgill Simpson Rapping About Prom Video Surfaces
Newly surfaced video shows a teenage Sturgill Simpson rapping about prom, revealing his early genre experiments.
Music
Post Malone Announces Double Album, Has ‘Run Out Of Shit To Say’
Post Malone is dropping a double album but fears he’s ‘run out of shit to say.’ The prolific artist promises a ‘fuckton of songs.’
Music
Harry Styles’ Meltdown Festival Is Mostly Disco, Occasionally Other Genres
Harry Styles’ Meltdown Festival lineup is heavily disco-focused. Organizer Brenda Glitterhoof confirmed around 60% of acts lean into the genre. Styles calls it a ‘safe space’ for disco.
Music
Kanye West Banned From Entering UK Over ‘Unacceptable Behavior’
Kanye West banned from UK due to hate speech. Home Office cites ‘public good’ in decision. This ban reflects global condemnation.
Music
Kurt Vile Announces First Album in Four Years and Massive Tour
Kurt Vile announces first album in four years and massive tour. Philadelphia’s Been Good to Me is the appropriately titled new record.
Music
Ye’s ‘BULLY’ Hits No. 1, Cementing His Reign of Mild Inconvenience
Ye’s ‘BULLY’ hit No. 1, proving his mastery of relatable frustrations and mild inconveniences.
Music
Olivia Dean Tops Charts, Proving Pop And R&B Radio Still Exist
Olivia Dean’s “Man I Need” hit Pop and R&B radio charts. This revived interest in radio, baffling experts who thought it died years ago.
Music
Harry Styles Meltdown Festival Lineup Prompts Existential Crisis
The Harry Styles Meltdown Festival lineup has left many bewildered. The pop icon curated a truly unique collection of sounds, defying all expectations.
Music
Iceage Announce New Album, Global Indifference Reaches Peak Levels
Iceage Announce New Album ‘For Love Of Grace & The Hereafter,’ causing a global wave of profound, yet entirely manageable, indifference.
Music
Kanye West Wireless Headline Set Sparks Controversy By Not Existing
The Kanye West Wireless headline set was reportedly canceled, despite never being officially booked, sparking controversy over a non-existent event.
Music
Wireless Festival Stands By Kanye West Booking, Cites ‘Bureaucratic Inertia’
Wireless Festival doubles down on its Kanye West booking. Organizers cite “unprecedented paperwork crisis” and “bureaucratic inertia” as primary reasons for the commitment.