Invisible Iran Talks Descend into Interpretive Pigeon Diplomacy
Invisible Iran Talks continue via mime, carrier pigeon, and a bewildered dolphin. Both nations vehemently deny…
Quiet Light’s ‘Postinternetfame’ Prompts Global Digital Paralysis
Quiet Light's new singles, "Postinternetfame" and "Self Tape," have plunged listeners into an unprecedented…
Gelli Haha’s Cloud Commute Raises Existential Questions for DMV Officials
Pop sensation Gelli Haha's new video shows her driving a cloud, baffling regulatory bodies. Fans demand…
U.S. Immigration Slowdown Leaves Nation Overwhelmed By Space
A critical Immigration Slowdown has left the U.S. with an unprecedented surplus of personal space. Citizens now…
James K friend remix album drops, features new tracks from friends
James K's new friend remix album is out, featuring collaborations with Objekt, Jasss, and more.
Korn’s ‘Freak on a Leash’ Is TikTok’s Newest Viral Dance Craze
Korn's 'Freak on a Leash' is a TikTok viral dance craze thanks to Zara Larsson. Gen Z embraces nu-metal.
Sepultura Invited Cavalera Brothers To Final Show; They Declined
Sepultura invited the Cavalera brothers to their final show, but they declined due to 'scheduling conflicts'…
Snail Mail Unveils “Tractor Beam” Song, Uses Actual Tractor Beam on Fallon
Snail Mail's performance of new song "Tractor Beam" on Fallon involved literal tractor beam effects, levitating…
Earl Sweatshirt, MIKE, & SURF GANG Drop “Leadbelly” Amidst Existential Dread
Earl Sweatshirt, MIKE, & SURF GANG's new single "Leadbelly" drops, continuing their tradition of bleak,…
Gelli Haha’s “Klouds Will Carry Me To Sleep” Blamed For Increased Cloud Subscriptions
Gelli Haha's new song "Klouds Will Carry Me To Sleep" causes massive cloud storage subscriptions. Fans seek…