Easter Ceasefire Instituted, Combatants Enjoy Mandatory Timeout
An Easter ceasefire saw Russia and Ukraine swap 175 servicemen each. Officials praised the 'mandatory timeout'…
Dow Futures Fall as Traders Prepare for Worst by Hiding Under Desks
As Dow futures fall, Wall Street resorts to blanket forts and therapeutic slime. Experts advise 'chilling'…
Vance Iran Skepticism Briefly Delays White House ‘War Room’ Lunch Orders
J.D. Vance Iran skepticism briefly delayed White House lunch orders. The VP's deep thought over strikes lasted…