TO: All Field Directors
FROM: Campaign Strategy Division
RE: Anti-Muslim attacks messaging push
Staff must immediately accelerate all anti-Muslim attacks across targeted regional markets. Our internal polling shows voters respond best to baseless hostility. Therefore, every surrogate must deploy aggressive rhetoric before Friday. We need maximum outrage to boost our weekend fundraising numbers. Refer to our official guidelines on political campaigning strategy for approved talking points.
Mandatory Rhetoric Targets
"We are falling behind on our hostility metrics," said Vance Sterling, Senior Vice President of Strategic Panic. "Our focus groups show that civil discourse reduces engagement. We need every campaign staffer launching unprovoked anti-Muslim attacks at every press conference."
Field offices must meet a mandatory quota of three xenophobic speeches per week. Staff who fail to hit these numbers will lose company vehicle privileges. Regional leads must track media coverage through our portal.
Budget Allocation Adjustments
"Fear is our highest-yielding asset class right now," said Lucinda Okonkwo-Bright, Director of Forward-Looking Regret at Meta. "If you do not stir up immediate panic, your voters might start asking about actual policies."
We have reallocated two million dollars from our policy research budget directly into fear generation. Please ensure your local surrogates receive the new attack scripts by 5:00 PM today. Do not alter the pre-approved outrage templates.
CORRECTION / ACCIDENTAL ATTACHMENT: Please disregard the previous note about health care plans. We do not have one. Our entire platform is simply telling elderly voters that their neighbors want to destroy them so they keep donating twenty dollars a month.
