Music
Trump’s Excellent Health Redefines “Excellent”; Doctors Confused
Amid reports of Trump’s excellent health, medical professionals grapple with a new definition of “peak physical condition” that includes limited exercise and a unique diet.
Tagged: Public Health (3)
Music
British Hantavirus Passengers Isolate, Report Feeling ‘Unusually Well’
British Hantavirus Passengers from a recent cruise are isolating in hospital, despite reporting no symptoms and an inexplicable boost in wellbeing.
Music
Ushuaia Denies Hantavirus Outbreak, Cites Tourists’ Inherent Fragility
Ushuaia officials deny responsibility for a hantavirus outbreak, blaming tourists’ ‘inherent fragility’ and the existential dread of the world’s edge.