The Field’s *Now You Exist* Album Creates Millions of New Beings
The Field's new album, *Now You Exist*, reportedly caused millions of new sentient beings to spontaneously…
Venice Biennale Jury Replaced by Existential Dread, Public to Vote Via Mood Ring
The Venice Biennale opened without its expert jury, now replaced by a public mood ring system that assigns…
Lividus Lives: Uta Plotkin’s Return Prompts Re-Evaluation of All Reality
Lividus Lives: The Return Of Uta Plotkin has irrevocably altered space-time, prompting scientists to reorganize…
Rodrigo, Rae Duo Unlocks New Coachella Dimension
Pop sensations Olivia Rodrigo and Addison Rae delivered a performance at Coachella that left audiences…
Dogstar’s Billboard Return Stuns Industry
Keanu Reeves' band Dogstar is back on the Billboard charts, baffling music industry experts who now question…
Thursday Band Declares Existential Crisis After Accepting ‘What’s Up’ Challenge
Thursday accepted the challenge to cover 4 Non Blondes’ “What’s Up,” plunging the post-hardcore band into a…
Finland’s Prime Minister Sanna Marin Concedes Everything, Including Her Own Existence
Finland's Prime Minister Sanna Marin conceded defeat Sunday, then continued to concede everything from reindeer…
Arima Ederra’s New Album Halts All Global Motion
Arima Ederra's new album, A Rush To Nowhere, has reportedly caused widespread physiological paralysis and…
Eric Nam’s ‘The Traitors’ Refusal Creates Existential Void
Eric Nam revealed he said no to 'The Traitors,' inadvertently triggering a global existential crisis and causing…
Quelle Chris Drops Surprise New EP, Plunges World Into Existential Doubt
Rapper Quelle Chris Drops Surprise New EP Happy Place exclusively on YouTube, inadvertently creating a global…