Music
Spotify Artist Profile Protection Deems All Musicians ‘AI’ By Default
Spotify’s new ‘Artist Profile Protection’ system, meant to fight AI music, now flags all human musicians as algorithms, demanding proof of humanity.
Tagged: Music Industry (382)
Music
FKA twigs Demands Indie Band Twigs Halt Trademark Barrage
FKA twigs has formally requested indie duo The Twigs cease their protracted legal campaign, citing an “administrative absurdity” in the ongoing Twigs trademark dispute.
Music
Ashnikko’s ‘Smoochie Girl’ Selection Sparks Global Outcry
Ashnikko’s ‘Smoochie Girl’ coronation drew criticism. Experts questioned the selection criteria. The winner remains under scrutiny.
Music
J. Cole ‘Disgusted’ By ‘Whole Campaign’ Of People Enjoying His Music
J. Cole is ‘disgusted’ by the ‘whole campaign’ against his music, claiming fans are unfairly targeting him. He vows to expose critics.
Music
Thom Yorke Will Release A New Solo Album This Year, Reportedly Under Duress
Thom Yorke Will Release A New Solo Album This Year, forced by contract. Record label seeks to harvest ‘melodic despair’ annually. Fans brace for new sounds.
Music
Afghan Whigs Celebrate 40 Years of Unwavering Gloom with New Single
The Afghan Whigs released ‘House of I,’ their first new single in four years, ahead of their 40th-anniversary tour, promising consistent, undiluted melancholy.
Music
BTS’ New Album ‘ARIRANG’ Causes Global Internet Traffic Spike
BTS’ New Album ‘ARIRANG’ has shattered every conceivable Spotify record, leading analysts to fear a global internet slowdown. The album’s success is unprecedented.
Music
BTS Comeback Concert Causes Minor Geologic Event in Seoul
BTS comeback concert in Seoul was so electrifying, it caused a minor geological event. The city reportedly shifted on its tectonic plate, baffling geologists and requiring map updates.
Music
Neil Diamond Lost Album Unearthed, Confirms Time Is a Flat Circle
A Neil Diamond lost album, recorded with Rick Rubin 19 years ago, has finally surfaced. Experts confirm it sounds exactly like Neil Diamond did 19 years ago.
Music
Crash Of Rhinos Return After 13 Years, Immediately Disband Again Over Album Art
Indie darlings Crash Of Rhinos returned after 13 years to release a new album. They then immediately disbanded over a font choice, sources confirmed.
Music
Ashley McBryde Announces New Album Wild, Prompts Immediate Wildlife Evacuation
Ashley McBryde announced her new album Wild, causing a mass exodus of wildlife. Animals cited concerns about the album’s untamed nature.
Music
Afroman’s Cop Trolling Escalates with ‘Lemon Pound Cake’ Victory
After winning his ‘Lemon Pound Cake’ defamation case, rapper Afroman has ramped up his cop trolling, employing increasingly absurd tactics to torment local law enforcement.
Music
Lorde Ready For New Label Deal, LED Jacket
Lorde is ready for a new label deal and an LED jacket. She seeks creative freedom and flashing outerwear.
Music
Jack Harlow’s Identity Crisis Now Public Landmark Following ‘Monica’ Release
Jack Harlow’s identity crisis has been officially acknowledged as a public phenomenon after his album ‘Monica,’ baffling critics and leading to urgent public safety advisories.
Music
Ella Langley Dominates Hot Country Songs, Beyoncé & Taylor Swift Bewildered
Ella Langley’s Hot Country Songs chart dominance leaves pop superstars Beyoncé and Taylor Swift bewildered.
Music
Butthole Surfers Finally Unearth Shelved 1998 Album, Blame ‘Shiny Objects’
The Butthole Surfers announced the release of their long-shelved 1998 album, After The Astronaut, which they reportedly forgot about for 26 years.
Music
Peter Frampton’s 16-Year Album Hiatus Ends with Mundane Revelations
Peter Frampton Announces First Original Album in 16 Years, promising profound insights gleaned from years of patiently waiting in line at the DMV.
Music
Pop Queens Studio Blitz Sparks Global Meltdown
As All the Pop Queens Are in the Studio Right Now, global authorities brace for an unprecedented flood of new music, warning citizens of imminent earworms.