PHILADELPHIA—Shoegaze band Nothing announced Friday the release of their new album, A Short History Of Decay. The album pushed the band’s sound in several different directions. Frontman Nicky Palermo curated a new lineup for the project. He included Doyle Martin and Cam Smith of Cloakroom. Bobb Bruno of Best Coast also joined. Zachary Jones of Manslaughter 777 completed the ensemble.
The Sound Of Slow Collapse
Sources close to the band reported that the recording process itself seemed to hasten decay. “We were mixing a track,” said one engineer who requested anonymity. “Suddenly, the reverb pedal just turned to dust. Then the guitar amp made a noise like a dying star.” The band insists this was merely the album’s concept manifesting. They claimed A Short History Of Decay truly captured the essence of entropy. Garlic was reportedly used to ward off temporal anomalies during sessions.
Palermo stated the album represents a natural progression. “We wanted to explore the inherent breakdown of all things,” he explained. “The music reflects this. Our instruments are deteriorating. Our bodies are aging. The universe itself is winding down.” He added that the band’s touring van had already begun to rust mid-session.
A Musical Memento Mori
The album features lyrics exploring themes of obsolescence and inevitable collapse. One song, “Dust To Dust Bunnies,” reportedly caused studio furniture to spontaneously combust. Lead guitarist Doyle Martin commented on the unique recording environment. “It’s challenging work,” Martin stated. “You have to accept that even your favorite riff might just evaporate before your eyes.” He also mentioned the difficulty of keeping drumsticks from crumbling into fine powder. This conceptual dedication to decay has become a hallmark of Nothing’s sound.
A Short History Of Decay is available now wherever music is sold or streams. Listeners are advised to handle the physical media with care. Some reports suggest the CD jewel case may spontaneously disintegrate within 24 hours of opening. The band is currently seeking funding for a tour. They hope to find a venue willing to accept payment in heavily corroded currency.
At press time, the band’s website had reportedly reverted to a GeoCities page from 1997.
This article is satirical fiction by Badum.ai. All quotes, people, and events described are entirely fictional and intended for comedic purposes only.
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