Tagged: Finance (44)

A leaked internal memo demands absolute physical silence from employees to avoid upsetting the volatile Nvidia earnings report.

Teddy Okonkwo-Vance · Aug 26

Investors gather on Wall Street to perform ancient rituals, hoping stock futures rise in anticipation of major tech earnings.

Teddy Okonkwo-Vance · Aug 25

Financial analysts reveal the absurd reasons why Nvidia stock is down today, from bad-tasting microchips to a tragic lack of leather jackets.

Priya Castellanos · Aug 25

Treasury Department issues a recall on new secondary sanctions after they accidentally ban the U.S. dollar.

Teddy Okonkwo-Vance · Aug 25

The SEC rules that the latest stock market rotation requires traders to use physical gym equipment to shift assets.

June Halloway · Aug 24

Josh Kushner's fortune hits $17 billion as Thrive Capital abandons tech investing to focus on literal, ancient sorcery.

Harold Mbeki-Strand · Aug 23

The stock market today saw a massive bond selloff driven by inflation fears. Investors fled to safer assets, leaving many confused.

June Halloway · May 19

U.S. stocks are faring worse than during past geopolitical shocks. Investors are baffled by the unprecedented decline, with no clear end in sight.

Priya Castellanos · Mar 31