‘It Takes Two’ Finally Flatlines: Rob Base Anthem Deemed Legally Deceased
Iconic hip-hop anthem 'It Takes Two' declared legally deceased after decades of relentless play, its legacy…
Jordan Patterson’s ‘Songs From A Valley Girl’ Only Audible in Valley
Jordan Patterson's new EP 'Songs From A Valley Girl' has a highly specific target demographic. It is reportedly…
Drake Sets New Spotify Stream Record, World Wonders ‘When Will It Stop?’
Drake is Spotify’s Most-Streamed Artist in a Day for 2026 again, releasing three new albums. Fans report sonic…
Committee Declares ‘Any Five Songs’ Are Best Songs of the Week
Committee tasked with selecting the Best Songs of the Week admits to picking tracks at random, citing "general…
Charli XCX Returns With ‘Rock Music,’ Delivers Pure, Unadulterated ‘Rock’
Charli XCX’s new single “Rock Music” has critics buzzing. The pop icon delivers a raw, literal take on the…
Billie Eilish Posts Graphic Slaughterhouse Videos, Launches ‘Ethical Carnivore Certification’
Billie Eilish Posts Graphic Slaughterhouse Videos, then unveiled a new certification program. It allows…
RaiNao’s “GRIS” Plunges World into Mild Apathy; Pantone Stocks Plummet
RaiNao's new single "GRIS" has inadvertently plunged the world into a state of benign apathy, causing Pantone…
Madonna, Wintour Star in ‘Confessions II’ Teaser for ‘Devil Wears Prada 2’
Madonna and Anna Wintour confuse the internet with a ‘Confessions II’ theatrical promo for ‘Devil Wears Prada…
Finn Wolfhard’s Fire From The Hip Album Unearths Unforeseen Societal Shifts
Finn Wolfhard's Fire From The Hip album has reportedly caused spatial distortions, forced collaborations, and…
D4vd Quietly Dropped by Label After Executives Realize He Was Still Signed
Singer D4vd was quietly dropped from his major record label after an internal audit revealed executives had…