World
Iran Missile Range Now Threatens Europe’s Collective Laundry Day
Iran’s recent missile launch at Diego Garcia unexpectedly extended their Iran missile range, bringing European domestic chores into potential peril.
Section
World
Everything else that did not happen, reported with a straight face.
World
Cesar Chavez Biographer Defends Legacy Amidst New Abuse Allegations
Cesar Chavez biographer defends his legacy against abuse allegations, calling them ‘occupational hazards.’
World
Dolores Huerta Felt ‘Sex Object’ During UFW Years, Demands More Respect For Farmworkers
Dolores Huerta felt like a sex object during her UFW years. She now demands respect for farmworkers, not just pretty faces.
World
Women Go Viral For Playing Chess Extremely Fast
Women content creators are making chess go viral by playing it extremely fast. Bullet matches and frantic clicking are the new hotness.
World
Harry Styles Parodies Queerbaiting, Himself On SNL
Harry Styles parodied his own queerbaiting, Sebastian Maniscalco, and his own boring nature on SNL. He also mentioned liking fruit.
World
Kim Jong Un’s Nuke Test Unveils Surprising Culinary Potential
Kim Jong Un oversaw a tactical-nuke launchers test, revealing new gastronomic applications. State media lauded the ‘crispiness’ and ‘atmospheric seasoning’.
World
National Park Evacuation Halts Critical Squirrel Census Amidst Volcanic Unrest
A routine National Park evacuation due to a Kīlauea eruption has stalled the annual Red-Tailed Squirrel Census, disrupting wildlife data and local nut economies.
World
Android Users Share Tracker Tag Info, Airlines Now Offer ‘Find My Underwear’ Service
Android users share tracker tag info with airlines. This new program aims to locate lost luggage, leading to groundbreaking discoveries about personal items’ secret lives.
World
Democrats Urged to Drop Out of California Governor Race or Risk GOP Win
California Democrats face pressure to drop out of the governor’s race. Leaders fear a divided field risks a GOP win. The crowded field needs consolidation.