LONDON—A London courtroom descended into chaos today during the copyright infringement lawsuit over the upcoming survival horror title. Transcripts from the proceedings reveal how electronic icon Peaches allegedly used forbidden frequency modulation to produce her new remix for the project. Under intense cross-examination, industry executives admitted that Peaches remixes are actually designed to summon multi-dimensional entities into modern dance clubs.
PROSECUTING COUNSEL: State your name and occupation for the record.
WITNESS: My name is Marcus Bellweather. I am the Senior VP of Playlist Emotional Intelligence at Spotify.
Q: Mr. Bellweather, let us discuss the track in question. Did your platform approve the distribution of these Peaches remixes?
A: We did. The algorithm flagged it as highly engaging for listeners who enjoy leather and industrial meat hooks.
Q: And you knew this song would appear in a Hellraiser video game?
A: Yes. It fits the brand perfectly. But we did not anticipate the physical manifestation of Pinhead in our Stockholm server room.
Q: Is it true that the bassline in these Peaches remixes utilizes actual human screams pitched down three octaves?
A: Yes, that is standard practice in electroclash. We call it organic synthesis. The labels have used it since 2001.
Q: To what end, Mr. Bellweather?
A: To optimize user retention. If a listener is trapped in a puzzle box of eternal torment, they cannot close the app.
Q: So the entire streaming industry benefits from this demonic pact?
A: Of course. Our third-quarter growth projections relied heavily on the suffering of the damned.
At press time, the judge ordered the courtroom cleared after the court reporter accidentally solved a Rubik's cube and opened a portal to a dimension of pure, unceasing synthpop.
