FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
MELBOURNE— The Australian Department of Defence has officially classified the recent Like A Version cover by daine as a class-one acoustic deterrent. The hyperpop artist recently performed a chaotic cover of Martin Solveig and Dragonette's 2010 hit "Hello." Government officials immediately seized the master tapes for national security purposes.
A Tactical Shift In Pop
The government will deploy the Like A Version cover by daine across coastal waters. Navy vessels will blast the track to deter unauthorized vessels. "The high-frequency vocal fry acts like a physical barrier," explained Gordon Flense, Deputy Undersecretary for Things That Were Fine Before. "We tried using classic rock. It did not work. The triple j studio has inadvertently created a sound weapon."
Military tests confirm the Like A Version cover by daine causes immediate, harmless confusion. It makes listeners search for a missing bassline that never drops.
Corporate Synergy Meets National Defense
Music executives praised the strategic partnership. "We are thrilled to monetize public safety," said Marcus Bellweather, Spotify's Senior VP of Playlist Emotional Intelligence. "This track fits perfectly into our 'Workout' and 'Imminent Dread' playlists. We expect high streaming numbers from naval destroyers."
About the Department of Acoustic Harm
The Department of Acoustic Harm manufactures synthetic hype to mask policy failures. We specialize in converting Australian indie pop into weapons of mild irritation. We do not offer refunds.
