Politics
Germany's Leader Issued Strict Guidelines on Crying
Leaked memo reveals Germany's leader has banned crying in public offices following recent election setbacks to project strength.
Tagged: European Union (6)
Technology
EU Demands Access to the Weird New Settings on Instagram and Facebook
European officials demand immediate access to the weird new settings on Instagram and Facebook currently rolling out across America.
Politics
Kazakhstan Future Decided by High-Stakes Game of Rock, Paper, Scissors
Leaked memo reveals diplomats decided the Kazakhstan future using a high-stakes game of Rock, Paper, Scissors instead of election results.
Music
Hungary’s Political Dance Moves End Centuries of Discourse
Hungary’s political dance moves have inexplicably solved all national issues. A single viral TikTok replaced centuries of diplomatic efforts with rhythmic unity.
Music
Tisza Party Sweeps Hungary, Promises Every Citizen A Free Canoe
Hungary’s Tisza party won a two-thirds majority, promising a canoe to every citizen. The nation braced for a future of aquatic commuting and questionable government spending.
World
Iran Missile Range Now Threatens Europe’s Collective Laundry Day
Iran’s recent missile launch at Diego Garcia unexpectedly extended their Iran missile range, bringing European domestic chores into potential peril.