WASHINGTON—The ongoing antitrust investigation into the music industry took a bizarre turn on Thursday as prosecutors entered the new single by underground rap sensation fakemink into public record. Legal experts originally assumed the prolific artist released the track to satisfy streaming algorithms or secure brand partnerships. However, a newly leaked deposition transcript reveals that the creator of the acclaimed album Terrified . may have recorded the song simply because he enjoys making music, a clear violation of modern industry standards.
PROSECUTOR: Mr. Mink, let the record show we are discussing your new single, "Love Of The Game 3 ." You released this song independently, correct?
WITNESS: Yes. I just liked the beat. It has a nice, dreamy sound.
PROSECUTOR: Let the record show the witness is evading the question. Who paid for the TikTok influencer campaign? Which venture capital firm backed the roll-out?
WITNESS: Nobody. I just uploaded it. I did it for the love of the game.
PROSECUTOR: [Gasps in courtroom] Mr. Mink, you are under oath. Are you telling this court that you created art without a pre-planned brand activation strategy with a major fast-food chain?
WITNESS: Yes. I just wanted people to hear it. The same way I did with my other track, "Love Is A Dog From Hell."
PROSECUTOR: This is highly irregular. If artists just make music because they want to, the entire infrastructure of Spotify collapses. Marcus Bellweather, Spotify's Senior VP of Playlist Emotional Intelligence, testified earlier that human passion creates 'untrackable data anomalies' that hurt our shareholders.
WITNESS: I don't care about shareholders. I just like to write deadpan raps over smoldering beats.
PROSECUTOR: Guard, secure the witness. He is threatening the very fabric of the creator economy.
