Music
Olivia Rodrigo’s Daisy Chain Fields Festival Aims To Unite Generations
Olivia Rodrigo’s Daisy Chain Fields Festival announced, featuring Bikini Kill, Stevie Nicks, and Chappell Roan. A celebration of female artists.
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Music
Satirical news and absurd commentary on the music industry, artists, charts and everything in between.
Music
Carly Rae Jepsen Announces Double Album, Finally Releasing Music For Both Day And Night
Carly Rae Jepsen is releasing a double album, ‘Day And Night.’ Fans are thrilled for the full 24-hour musical experience from the pop star.
Music
Rod Stewart Oxygen Tank Prompts New Tour Merch: Personal Ventilators
Rod Stewart’s latest concert featured an oxygen tank, leading him to demand the entire audience join him in a ‘shared breathing experience.’ New merch planned.
Music
Kirk Hammett’s Stage Fall Seen As Karma For Swiftie Insult
Kirk Hammett’s stage fall in Dublin is being called karma. He angered Swifties days earlier by wearing a Taylor Swift CIA shirt.
Music
Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘You Seem Pretty Sad’ Hits No. 1; Fans Wonder If She’s Okay
Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘You Seem Pretty Sad’ is No. 1. The album proves existential dread is a profitable business for the pop star.
Music
The Alchemist’s ‘Liquid Form’ EP Offers Hope For Rap’s Future
The Alchemist’s new EP ‘Liquid Form’ is hailed as a sign of rap’s enduring vitality, with fans claiming the beats offer a sonic cure for modern music.
Music
Ed Sheeran’s Nashville Concert Featured Ed Sheeran, Hit Songs
Ed Sheeran’s dynamic, hit-filled Nashville show proved he is still Ed Sheeran. He played hit songs.
Music
Desire’s “Summer Skin” Now Constitutes 3% Of Earth’s Atmosphere
Desire’s new track, “Summer Skin,” has infiltrated the Earth’s atmosphere, scientists confirm. The song’s persistent shimmer is causing widespread environmental changes.
Music
SZA Warns AI Is Exploiting Black Artists, Demands Robot Royalty Checks
SZA warns AI is exploiting Black artists, fears robots will steal jobs and creative output. She questions if AI can truly replicate soul.
Music
Iran Closes Strait of Hormuz, Only Trapping a Single Pelican
Iran closes the Strait of Hormuz in a bold move. The decision primarily impacts a single pelican, as global shipping had already abandoned the empty waterway.
Music
MIKE’s Young World Festival Unveils 2026 Lineup; Millennials Already Too Old
MIKE’s Young World Festival dropped its 2026 lineup. Experts wonder if today’s youth will still be considered “young” in two years.
Music
Travis Kelce Joins Chris Lake, Briefly Embraces Life as Human Spotlight Stand
Travis Kelce Joins Chris Lake on stage, taking on the demanding role of “human spotlight stand” in a performance described as “intensely focused.”
Music
Curacao Keeper’s 15 Saves Trigger ‘Unfair Advantage’ Probe
Curacao keeper Eloy Room’s record 15 saves are under investigation for creating an “unfair advantage,” prompting a global ethics inquiry into goal prevention.
Music
Zelenskyy Returns Poland’s Highest Honor, Requests Gift Receipt
President Zelenskyy officially returned Poland’s highest honor, citing “unclear ownership” and demanding a full refund or store credit in a bizarre diplomatic escalation.
Music
Iron Maiden Fans Locked Out Of Phone-Free Zone
Iron Maiden enforces a phone-free zone for their concert film, leading to fan confusion and existential dread about missing notifications.
Music
Colombia’s Brutal Internal Conflict Bolsters Voter Engagement, Say Experts
Experts laud Colombia’s brutal internal conflict for boosting voter engagement, claiming decades of strife makes electoral choices ‘crystal clear.’
Music
Ye’s Bully Deluxe Edition Now Includes Mandatory Recess
Students worldwide ordered to listen, or else.
Music
Sleep Returns With Tour, Comic Book, After Eight Years Of Intense Napping
Doom titans Sleep emerge from an eight-year nap. They bring a tour, comic book, and new song. The band claims they were sleeping.