Politics
Climate Goal Hearing Proves Oil Execs Knew The Future Was Cooked
A newly unsealed court transcript reveals energy giants knew they would miss the primary climate goal and bet against the future of human agriculture.
Tagged: Washington (7)
Politics
Pentagon Trial Reveals Fresh Strikes Were Just Live-Fire PowerPoint Demos
A leaked military court transcript reveals the U.S. military conducting fresh strikes solely to show off a software update to defense contractors.
Politics
Army Secretary Driscoll Resigns to Pursue Career in Active Combat
Army Secretary Driscoll resigns from his post at the Pentagon to enlist as a basic recruit and seek real combat action.
Politics
Product Recall Issued for Venezuelan Crude Oil Imports
Regulators issue an emergency recall for imported Venezuelan crude oil after tests reveal dangerous traces of collective bargaining and free transit.
Politics
Martian Voting Probe Sparks Intense Cosmic Election Security Fears
A federal investigation into Martian voting sparks intense debate over planetary residency requirements for local school board elections.
Business
Fed Chair Warsh fights inflation by whispering very quietly
Fed Chair Warsh fights inflation by whispering at reporters, claiming loud noises make the dollar lose its value.
Politics
Milo Yiannopoulos Detained Under Absurd Visa Provision
Court records reveal Milo Yiannopoulos detained by ICE for failing to meet his mandatory quota of public outrage.