Politics
Kremlin Peace Envoys Memo Outlines Mandatory Smile Protocol
A leaked internal memo reveals the strict behavioral guidelines for Kremlin peace envoys during high-stakes negotiations.
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Politics
Fictional political satire inspired by real headlines. All quotes and events are entirely made up.
Politics
Iranian Oil Tankers targeted in Navy directive to boost third quarter metrics
A leaked military memo reveals the Navy targeted Iranian oil tankers to meet quarterly performance metrics and boost team building.
Politics
New USPS Mail Ballot Rules Require Voters to Swallow Envelopes Whole
The new USPS mail ballot rules require voters to swallow their envelopes whole to guarantee absolute security for American citizens.
Politics
Politicians Find Voters Are Fed Up With Data Centers
Politicians discover that voters are fed up with data centers and are abandoning traditional platforms to campaign against the giant hum.
Politics
Finland's Prime Minister Sanna Marin Concedes Election To Quiet Forest
Finland's Prime Minister Sanna Marin concedes the election to a quiet patch of spruce trees after a tightly fought political contest.
Politics
Fetterman Texts Reveal Absurd Excuses Used to Avoid Constituent Duties
Leaked messages show Senator John Fetterman used bizarre excuses to avoid his constituent duties.
Politics
Foreign Funding Loops Recalled From Reform UK Political Inventory
Regulators issue a product recall notice for defective foreign funding loops used by Reform UK after catastrophic failure during an undercover sting.
Politics
5 Official Duties John Fetterman Skipped to Attend Shrek Rave
Leaked schedules reveal John Fetterman skipped major official duties, including committee hearings, to attend a touring Shrek-themed rave.
Politics
Philippine Court Implements Innovative Arrest Policy for Vague Political Threats
A Philippine court implements an arrest policy for vague threats to streamline political drama before things get too theatrical.
Politics
Missouri Supreme Court Orders Voters to Draw Congressional Maps with Etch a Sketches
The Missouri Supreme Court rejected the Trump-backed redistricting plan, ordering state maps to be drawn on Etch a Sketches.
Politics
Sanna Marin Defeat Triggers Urgent Recall of Left-Wing Finnish Election Campaign
Regulators issued an urgent recall of the Sanna Marin campaign after the Sanna Marin defeat, warning of severe economic structural flaws.
Politics
DOJ Memo Outlines Mail-In Ballot Restrictions Requiring Voters to Run Maze
A leaked DOJ memo reveals mail-in ballot restrictions that force voters to navigate complex corn mazes to cast their votes.
Politics
Missouri Supreme Court Orders Replacement Map Drawn In Crayon
The Missouri Supreme Court threw out the state's redistricting plan, ordering a replacement map drawn entirely in Crayola crayon.
Politics
GOP Map Redrawn to Resemble a Maze That Traps Voters Forever
Leaked internal memo reveals the new GOP map uses non-Euclidean geometry to trap voters in a physical maze.
Politics
USPS Plan To Restrict Mail Voting Will Upgrade Delivery to Carrier Pigeons
The new USPS plan to restrict mail voting replaces delivery trucks with a majestic fleet of carrier pigeons.
Politics
German Politician Testifies He Only Joined Far-Right AfD For The Free Branded Sausages
A German politician admits under oath he joined the far-right AfD solely for the complimentary sausages at their campaign rallies.
Politics
German Far-Right Demands Ban on Cubes to Neutralize Bauhaus School
A German far-right party targets the iconic Bauhaus school by demanding a national ban on three-dimensional cubes.
Politics
Hegseth Pentagon Purge Replaces Joint Chiefs With Cardboard Standees Of Himself
The Hegseth Pentagon purge reaches its logical conclusion as cardboard standees of the Defense Secretary replace the Joint Chiefs of Staff.