Technology
What To Expect From Apple's Pro And Tell Event
Here is what to expect from Apple's 'Pro and tell' event, including overpriced dongles and laptops that shame you.
Tagged: Consumer Electronics (31)
Technology
Apple Smart Home Device Glues Old iPad to Toaster
Apple announces its revolutionary Apple smart home device, which physically glues an old iPad directly to your kitchen toaster.
Technology
Leaked Apple Memo Demands Entry-Level MacBook Pro Overhaul Immediately
A leaked memo reveals Apple is rushing an entry-level MacBook Pro overhaul to trick consumers into buying new hardware.
Technology
Apple Smart Home Features Expected At Next Week's Unprecedented Event
Leaked documents reveal the top Apple smart home features coming next week, including judgmental sinks and hostage-taking door locks.
Technology
Apple 'Welcome Home' Event to Introduce Automated Doorbell That Judges Your Guests
The upcoming Apple 'Welcome Home' event will debut smart home devices designed to keep other humans far away from your house.
Technology
5 HomeKit Products Apple Will Launch at Its Smart Home Event
Apple is set to launch new HomeKit products that will monitor your daily habits and judge your lifestyle choices.
Technology
Court Transcript: Amazon Fire Tablets Phased Out Because Customers Asked for Pain
Leaked court transcripts reveal Amazon is phasing out Fire Tablets because they failed to deliver the deep existential torment customers actually crave.
Technology
Why You Need the Red Magic 12 Pro+ Right Now
The new Red Magic 12 Pro+ smartphone design has leaked, and it features a cooling tower and volcanic glass edges.
Technology
Early Prime Day Deals Under Fire in Tech Price-Fixing Trial
A federal court transcript reveals the dark psychological science behind early Prime Day deals and tech pricing.
Technology
Leaked Apple Memo Reveals New Smart Home Hub Just Traps Dust
A leaked Apple memo reveals the upcoming smart home hub is engineered primarily to sit in a corner and collect household dust.
Technology
Nothing's Headphones Deliver Absolute Silence for 400 Dollars
Nothing's Headphones (1) Pro cost $399 and deliver absolutely zero audio for the ultimate studio experience.
Technology
Apple Unveils Miniaturized Apple TV 4K That Fits Entirely Inside Your Ear Canal
Apple announces the new Apple TV 4K, a microscopic streaming device designed to slide directly into the human ear canal.
Technology
U.S. iPhone 18 Pro Max Contains Liquid Mercury
A federal hearing reveals the U.S. iPhone 18 Pro Max contains liquid mercury to satisfy American demands for heavy, dangerous tech.
Technology
Urgent Recall: Foldable iPhone Recalled After Users Repeatedly Fold Devices Longitudinally
Apple issues an emergency product recall notice for the new foldable iPhone after users immediately snap the screens in half hotdog-style.
Technology
Upcoming Apple Launch To Debut iPhone That Folds Into A Tiny, Perfect Mirror
The upcoming Apple launch will feature a foldable iPhone Ultra designed to function as a mirror for looking at your own panic.
Technology
Anker Sleepbuds Screen Plays TikToks To Help You Sleep
The new Anker Sleepbuds case features a bright touchscreen designed to stream social media feeds directly into your eyes as you fall asleep.
Technology
Sonos Unveils New Headphones That Scream to Cover Outside Noise
New Sonos headphones ditch traditional noise cancellation to actively scream over your loud neighbors.
Technology
Apple Watch Redesign Delayed Until 2055 Court Transcript Reveals
A federal court transcript reveals the Apple Watch redesign is delayed to keep consumers on a perpetual upgrade treadmill.