Politics
How to Tell the Dan Sullivans Apart in Alaska
Alaska voters face extreme confusion with two Dan Sullivans on the ballot. Here is how to tell them apart.
Section
Politics
Fictional political satire inspired by real headlines. All quotes and events are entirely made up.
Politics
Product Recall Notice: Trump Beef Tariff Policy Recalled For Severe Cow-Shortage Risk
A formal product recall notice for the Trump beef tariff policy due to a severe risk of angry Midwestern senators.
Politics
Trump Endorsement Recalled Due To Severe Risk Of Rapid Political Disintegration
Federal regulators issue an emergency recall for the Trump endorsement after severe campaign defects in South Carolina.
Politics
Historical Blame Recall Issued For The 1948 Altalena Ship Incident
Regulators issue a historical blame recall for the 1948 Altalena ship incident due to risks of extreme political opportunism.
Politics
Trump Tariffs Iran Sand Castles in Absurd New Round of Sanctions
New Iran sand castles sanctions target 60 beachfront structures as the U.S. Treasury Department freezes all miniature moat assets.
Politics
Trump's Economic War Targets the Global Supply of Pistachios
The administration escalates its economic war by targeting delicious imported snacks.
Politics
State Department Sends Diplomats Back to Embassies via Trebuchet
The State Department is returning diplomats back to embassies using a high-velocity tactical catapult system to avoid commercial flight delays.
Politics
Campaign Debuts South Carolina Senate Runoff To Feature Laser Show and Foam Machine
The South Carolina Senate runoff introduces laser shows and foam machines to boost voter turnout in a spectacular new campaign.
Politics
Supreme Court Approves New Trump Plan to Deliver Mail-In Voting via Trebuchet
A new Trump plan to restrict mail-in voting will require all ballots to be delivered to local election boards via medieval siege engine.
Politics
Municipal Grocery Stores Recalled After Multiple Customers Contract Extreme Bureaucracy
Regulators issue an urgent recall for municipal grocery stores after shoppers contract severe bureaucracy and liquid zoning law exposure.
Politics
Iran Economic Sanctions Recalled After Treasury Uses Wrong Font
A voluntary recall of the Iran economic sanctions has been issued after the Treasury Department accidentally printed the documents in Comic Sans.
Politics
Secret Kushner Meeting Revealed To Be Elaborate Wax Museum Prank
A secret Kushner meeting between Hakeem Jeffries and a wax figure has sparked intense backlash ahead of the midterms.
Politics
Kazakhstan Election Ballot Redesign Leaked in Internal Memo
A leaked internal memo reveals Kazakhstan election officials plan to streamline voting by removing all opposing candidates from the ballot.
Politics
Pete Buttigieg Launches Campaign To Make South Carolina Slightly More Beige
Pete Buttigieg returns to South Carolina with an exciting new initiative to make the state slightly more beige.
Politics
Kazakh President’s Grip on Power To Be Upgraded with New Hydraulic Pistons
Leaked documents show the president’s grip on power is getting a massive physical upgrade with heavy-duty industrial hydraulics.
Politics
Democracy Recall Notice: Ukrainian Elections Recalled For Extreme Danger
A formal democracy recall notice warns that holding Ukrainian elections under current conditions may lead to catastrophic structural failure.
Politics
Kazakhstan Future Decided by High-Stakes Game of Rock, Paper, Scissors
Leaked memo reveals diplomats decided the Kazakhstan future using a high-stakes game of Rock, Paper, Scissors instead of election results.
Politics
Leaked Memo Details Russia's Secret Military Mobilization Office Perks
A leaked internal memo reveals Russia's corporate-style perks to boost military mobilization recruiting.