Music
Tom Morello Vote Shock Waves Rock Non-Partisan Festival
A sudden Tom Morello vote controversy rocks the non-partisan Power To The People festival after the guitarist rejects corporate Democrats.
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Technology
Early Prime Day Deals Under Fire in Tech Price-Fixing Trial
A federal court transcript reveals the dark psychological science behind early Prime Day deals and tech pricing.
Music
Polaris Tribute Track 'Without You' Outsources Sadness to AI
Polaris Tribute Track 'Without You' automates the band's grief for Ryan Siew with help from Goldman Sachs.
Politics
Beijing promises to fight back with incredibly polite sternly worded emails
Beijing promises to fight back against diplomatic visits by upgrading to a premium Mailchimp account for passive-aggressive emails.
Music
Taylor Swift NFL Appearance Subpoenaed in Federal Payola Investigation
A federal grand jury investigates if a Taylor Swift NFL appearance violates antitrust laws and broadcast payola regulations.
Business
Aramco Oil Tankers Will Now Launch Drone Strikes Back
Leaked memo reveals Aramco oil tankers are being retrofitted with weapon systems to launch counter-drone strikes in the Red Sea.
Music
Kid Rock Eminem Collaboration Proves Friendship Can Survive Anything
The new Kid Rock Eminem collaboration aims to heal a divided nation through the power of aggressive rap-rock duets.
Politics
Trump Launches Super Intelligence Force to Defeat Low IQ Code
Trump launches the Super Intelligence Force to replace weak computer code with the smartest, most beautiful algorithms in the world.
Music
Product Recall Issued for 2026 Upcoming Albums Due to Temporal Hazard
Regulators issue an immediate safety recall for all 2026 upcoming albums due to severe temporal displacement hazards.
Technology
New AirPods Pro 3 Feature AI Screaming To Block Out Silence
Apple's new AirPods Pro 3 feature AI screaming to ensure users never have to endure the horror of their own thoughts.
Music
Carly Rae Jepsen 2027 Tour Promises Non-Stop 24-Hour Concerts
The Carly Rae Jepsen 2027 tour will feature nonstop 24-hour performances to support her new double album.
Technology
New Lighter MacBook Pro Floats Away Into Space
The new lighter MacBook Pro is so thin that it literally floats away into the sky if you do not buy the optional $149 Apple Tether.
Music
The 5 Best Songs of the Week Memo Leaks From Indie Blog HQ
A leaked memo details the terrifying corporate science behind choosing The 5 Best Songs of the Week.
Music
Ryan Hemsworth Never Learned Song Used to Laundering Canadian Indie Royalty Money
A court transcript reveals how the Ryan Hemsworth Never Learned single allegedly laundered Canadian indie music grants through complex shell accounts.
Technology
Samsung Executive Leaks Memo Detailing Major Galaxy S27 Ultra Decision Delay
A leaked Samsung memo reveals the company cannot make the final Galaxy S27 Ultra decision because they are afraid of the future.
Music
Stray Kids Grammy Boycott Forces Recording Academy to Listen to Music
The Stray Kids Grammy boycott leaves voters panicked as they are forced to actually listen to submissions.
Technology
AI Infrastructure Supercycle Prompts Construction of New Digital Abyss
A tech giant breaks ground on a massive server farm to support the AI infrastructure supercycle, promising to turn electricity into useless data.
Music
Gripper Debut Album Announced Alongside Corporate Synergy Initiative
The Gripper debut album has been officially announced. Read the corporate press release detailing this historic garage-punk partnership.