Music
Album Leaf Branches Out With A Body Of Voices
The Album Leaf’s new album, A Body Of Voices, features collaborations and sounds previously unheard on any leaf.
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Music
Satirical news and absurd commentary on the music industry, artists, charts and everything in between.
Music
Drake’s ‘ICEMAN’ Holds Billboard 200 No. 1 For Fourth Week
Drake’s ambient ice machine album ‘ICEMAN’ holds Billboard 200 No. 1 for a fourth week, baffling critics and delighting fans.
Music
Drake Dethrones Adele, Eyes Wallen For Total Chart Domination
Drake now holds the record for most weeks at No. 1 on the Billboard 200, surpassing Adele and setting his sights on Morgan Wallen.
Music
Alice Cooper Gifts His Latest Album To Man Who Found His Credit Card, Sparks Debt Crisis Fear
Alice Cooper Gifts His Latest Album To Man Who Found His Credit Card, sparking economic panic as experts warn of a dangerous precedent.
Music
Ed Sheeran’s ‘LOOP Tour’ Traps Thousands in Endless Repetitive Concert
Ed Sheeran’s “LOOP Tour” has literally trapped thousands of fans in an unending temporal loop, with concerts repeating endlessly.
Music
‘Gloorp Ice Bath’ Plunges Listeners Into Immediate Hypothermia
Gloorp’s new single ‘Ice Bath’ (Feat. Chasia) is causing listeners to spontaneously shiver and feel an icy plunge, prompting a public health warning.
Music
Katy Perry Sings With 10-Year-Old Tius Luka, Unleashes Global Toddlerhood
The performance where Katy Perry Sings With 10-Year-Old Tius Luka reportedly caused millions of adults to regress to childhood, demanding snacks and naps.
Music
Elon Musk’s Vast Empire Acquires Concept of ‘Free Time’
Elon Musk’s vast empire has acquired “free time.” The concept of personal leisure now falls under X Holdings, baffling experts and workers alike.
Music
The 5 Best Songs Of The Week Induce Widespread Apathy
The latest list of “The 5 Best Songs Of The Week” has been released, prompting a global surge in quiet indifference and existential ennui, say baffled experts.
Music
Washington Jet Crash Blamed On Pilot’s Urgent Need For Gas Station Coffee
Pilot’s urgent need for a double-shot espresso causes Washington Jet Crash, sparking wildfire. Military officials confirm mission integrity was secondary to caffeine.
Music
Olivia Rodrigo Shares ‘Stupid Song,’ World Prepares for Unprecedented Simplicity
Olivia Rodrigo Shares ‘stupid song,’ a new track celebrated for its total lack of depth. Experts praise its groundbreaking commitment to banality.
Music
Olivia Rodrigo Sings Her ‘Stupid Song’ For Honking Cabs
Olivia Rodrigo sings her ‘stupid song’ in Central Park and a corner store. Her relatable video captures urban despair.
Music
Finland’s PM’s Dance Moves Tipped Election; Voters Demanded More Wiggle Room
Finland’s former PM Sanna Marin lost the election due to her uninspired PM’s Dance Moves, baffling analysts until voter exit polls revealed rhythmic disappointment.
Music
Elvis Costello Knocks Oasis, Defends Olivia Rodrigo’s Musical Prowess
Elvis Costello slammed Oasis, calling them ‘hack,’ while defending Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘authentic angst.’
Music
La Sécurité’s Bingo! Declared Official Soundtrack for Existential Weekends
La Sécurité’s Bingo! is the art-punk party record your weekend needs, offering a soundtrack for existential dread and spontaneous dance-offs.
Music
Sanna Marin Election Concession Leaves Finland Without Its Favorite DJ
Finland plunges into a silent disco after Sanna Marin’s election concession. The nation grapples with a loss of rhythm, awaiting a new national playlist.
Music
Texas’s GOP Platform So Extreme, It Now Demands Loyalty From Local Tumbleweeds
Texas’s GOP platform has grown so extreme and influential, it now demands ideological loyalty from tumbleweeds and plans to enforce conservative orbits on planets.
Music
Fousheé’s ‘Drive’ Produced by Elias Rønnenfelt, Requires No License
Fousheé’s new song ‘Drive,’ produced by Elias Rønnenfelt, is surprisingly road-legal. Critics question its artistic merit due to its extreme compliance.