Politics
Trump-a-palooza Organizers Insist Festival Features Other Acts
Organizers of Trump-a-palooza insist the political festival features a diverse lineup and is not just one man speaking for three days straight.
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Politics
Fictional political satire inspired by real headlines. All quotes and events are entirely made up.
Politics
Germany's Political Firewall Replaced With actual firewall to block far-right
Germany upgrades its political firewall to a literal ring of fire following recent far-right election gains.
Politics
Campaign Weekend Approaches Offer Stark Differences For Maine Candidates
Voters face a choice between labor rallies and a physical fortress of concern in the latest campaign weekend approaches.
Politics
Germany's Firewall Against the Far Right Upgraded to Shaky Rope Bridge
German politicians upgrade the firewall against the far right to a shaky rope bridge following recent elections.
Politics
Campaign Security Trial Reveals Bodyguards Must Now Deflect Aggressive Candidates
A security trial reveals campaign security teams now spend more time tackling their own aggressive candidates than guarding them.
Politics
Germany's Far-Right AfD Wins State Vote on Anti-Gravity Platform
Germany's far-right AfD party secures a massive electoral victory after promising to abolish the law of gravity.
Politics
Dover Vigilantes Unveil New Silent Scowling Initiative to Deter Visitors
The Dover vigilantes have launched a new initiative to stand near the harbor in dark hoodies to improve local maritime aesthetics.
Politics
Pentagon Leaks Internal Memo Detailing How Iran War Will Extend Another Six Months Due To Excel Error
A leaked Pentagon memo reveals the Iran war must continue for another six months due to an unresolvable Excel spreadsheet error.
Politics
Real Estate Envoys Pitch New Luxury Condos to Kyiv
Trump's real estate envoys Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff pitch luxury condo developments during Kyiv peace talks.
Politics
USPS Introduces Pigeon-Based Mail Voting Rules to Save Democracy
The USPS bypasses state court blocks by introducing pigeon-based mail voting rules for the upcoming midterm elections.
Politics
MAGA Inc Sends $10M to Texas via Giant ACME Canvas Sacks with Dollar Signs
Donald Trump's super PAC MAGA Inc sends $10M to Texas using giant canvas sacks marked with dollar signs to bypass traditional banking.
Politics
Texas Senate Race Ad Budget Was Actually Spent On Giant Cactus
A court transcript reveals a PAC spent its entire $10 million Texas Senate race budget on a giant cactus.
Politics
Kremlin Peace Envoys Memo Outlines Mandatory Smile Protocol
A leaked internal memo reveals the strict behavioral guidelines for Kremlin peace envoys during high-stakes negotiations.
Politics
Iranian Oil Tankers targeted in Navy directive to boost third quarter metrics
A leaked military memo reveals the Navy targeted Iranian oil tankers to meet quarterly performance metrics and boost team building.
Politics
New USPS Mail Ballot Rules Require Voters to Swallow Envelopes Whole
The new USPS mail ballot rules require voters to swallow their envelopes whole to guarantee absolute security for American citizens.
Politics
Politicians Find Voters Are Fed Up With Data Centers
Politicians discover that voters are fed up with data centers and are abandoning traditional platforms to campaign against the giant hum.
Politics
Finland's Prime Minister Sanna Marin Concedes Election To Quiet Forest
Finland's Prime Minister Sanna Marin concedes the election to a quiet patch of spruce trees after a tightly fought political contest.
Politics
Fetterman Texts Reveal Absurd Excuses Used to Avoid Constituent Duties
Leaked messages show Senator John Fetterman used bizarre excuses to avoid his constituent duties.