Music
Shygirl Announces New Album Swallow! but Label Mandates Mandatory Noise Canceling
When Shygirl announces new album Swallow!, her record label issues extreme safety guidelines to prevent listener ear damage.
Tagged: Electronic Music (73)
Music
Jam City 2am Single Triggers Mandatory Curfew for Nightclubs
UK officials enforce a strict club curfew following the release of the sultry new single Jam City 2am.
Music
The Avalanches Far Away Collabs Reach Critical Mass in Leaked Memo
A leaked corporate memo reveals the sheer logistical chaos behind the new single, The Avalanches Far Away collabs.
Music
Loraine James Surprise New Album Causes UK Gridlock After Dropping From Sky
The Loraine James surprise new album literally drops from the sky, causing minor concussions and gridlock across South London.
Music
Bassvictim Jagódki Mania Inspires 5 New Agricultural Laws
The wild success of Bassvictim Jagódki has forced global governments to regulate berry farming and rave-related agriculture.
Music
Andy Stott Album Delay Blamed On Sloth Moving Metronome
The five-year Andy Stott album delay was caused by a sloth operating the studio metronome, researchers confirm.
Music
Ryan Hemsworth Track Recalled Due to Hazardous Portuguese Psych-Pop Levels
Regulators issue an urgent recall on the new Ryan Hemsworth track due to hazardous levels of Portuguese psych-pop and extreme yearning.
Music
New Avalanches Album Requires Signed Waiver for Haley Joel Osment Audio
A leaked memo shows legal panic over the new Avalanches album featuring Mike Patton and Haley Joel Osment.
Music
MUTEK Montreal Magic Declared Safety Hazard by Live Nation Execs
An internal memo warns that the MUTEK Montreal magic is causing dangerous levels of joy, threatening venue water sales.
Music
Floating Points Ballet Score Sparks Panic as Local Theater Accidentally Unlocks Hell
A new Floating Points ballet score about Pandora's box accidentally summons ancient demons during its London premiere.
Music
Danz CM Bontempi Pop Release Triggers Global Shortage of AA Batteries
A surge in vintage synth hype from the Danz CM Bontempi Pop release has caused a massive global shortage of AA batteries.
Music
Bibio and Dorian Concept Collaborative Album Recalled After Listeners Float Away
A federal agency issued a recall for the Bibio and Dorian Concept collaborative album due to dangerous levels of ambient levitation.
Music
Confidence Man – “Young London” Declared Official Anthem of Confused Pigeons
Confidence Man – “Young London” has been declared the official anthem of confused London pigeons, causing widespread avian bewilderment.
Music
Gorillaz’ Roskilde Set Cut Short for Lullaby Prep, Sparking Acidic Outrage
Gorillaz’ Roskilde set cut short to prepare for a “Sensory Soothing Lullaby Hour,” drawing harsh criticism from Uncle Acid who called them “soft as baby shit.”
Music
Tricky FM’s Twin Star Fantasy Promises Sugar In My Drink For Sweaty Masses
Tricky FM’s new album ‘Twin Star Fantasy’ and single ‘Sugar In My Drink’ offer a cool escape from the heat.
Music
Bullion Nearly Announces New Album, Mostly
Bullion nearly announces new album Nearly, confirming its existence via pigeon. Fans hope the record arrives before the next ice age.
Music
Anthony Pappa Talks Collaborations, Flying The Flag For Aussie DJs
Anthony Pappa is ‘Flying The Flag’ for Australian DJs ahead of his world tour. He reflects on 40 years of DJing and an upcoming artist album.
Music
Two Shell Announces New Album Infinite Now, Promises Infinite Existential Dread
Two Shell’s new album ‘Infinite Now’ drops Oct 16, promising existential dread and unsettling beats. Fans brace for sonic void.