Music
Anna Domino Reissue Lost Again in Maze of Belgian Post Office
The legendary Anna Domino reissue of East And West remains lost in a Brussels sorting facility after a forty-year postal delay.
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Music
Satirical news and absurd commentary on the music industry, artists, charts and everything in between.
Music
Willi Carlisle Gas Station Tribute Inspires 5 New Truck Stop Rituals
The new Willi Carlisle Gas Station song has inspired indie folk fans to occupy local truck stops for spiritual reasons.
Music
Lil Nas X Returns with a new single that requires absolute corporate obedience
Leaked memo reveals Columbia Records staff must legally declare that Lil Nas X Returns with the absolute greatest song of all time.
Music
Shady Bug Seed Recalled Due to Excessive Sonic Dirt
Regulators issue a recall for the new Shady Bug seed single due to extreme fuzz and dangerous levels of sonic dirt.
Music
Peter Gabriel New Album Recalled Due to Severe Gravitational Disruption
Regulators issue a recall on the Peter Gabriel new album after dual-mix tracks cause localized gravitational collapses.
Music
Talking Heads Reissue Contains Five LPs of David Byrne Panicking
The new Talking Heads reissue of 'Fear of Music' features five entire vinyl discs of David Byrne hyperventilating in a dark room.
Music
Yung Miami Debut Solo Album Sparks Global Sound Wave Evacuations
The Yung Miami debut solo album 'Watch Dis' drops with so much bass that Florida officials issued localized tsunami warnings.
Music
Vince Staples Album Philosophy Adopted by Major Label to Lower Production Costs
Def Jam adopts the Vince Staples album philosophy to cut mastering budgets and release unfinished voice memos.
Music
Latin Mafia Vulnerability Recall Issued After Album Causes Outbreak of Uncontrollable Weeping
A formal product recall has been issued for Latin Mafia vulnerability after their album caused widespread emotional hazards.
Music
Kelly Clarkson Demands Separate Charts For AI Artists Who Do Not Feel The Pain of Divorce
Kelly Clarkson demands separate charts for AI artists to protect human pop stars who actually suffer through messy divorces.
Music
Grumpy Release Show Memo Leaks Outlining Strict Hide-and-Seek Protocols
Leaked memo reveals strict hide-and-seek protocols for the upcoming Grumpy release show presented by Stereogum.
Music
Federal Recall Issued for Stella Lefty Songs Due to Major Plagiarism Hazard
A federal recall has been issued for Stella Lefty songs due to severe plagiarism hazards. Regulators warn the tracks contain stolen melodies.
Music
Early '80s Synthpop Duo 50/50 Releasing Album After 40 Years of Arguing Over Who Plugs in the Roland Juno-6
The early '80s synthpop duo 50/50 finally settled their 40-year power strip dispute to release their debut album.
Music
Chastity Belt Announce New Album to Verify Friendship Status of Local Scene Members
Chastity Belt announce new album 'All My Friends' as a legally binding audit of their actual real-life social circle.
Music
Mystics 20th Anniversary Edition Unleashes 400 Hours of Wayne Coyne Screaming Into a Bucket
The deluxe Mystics 20th Anniversary Edition box set features 400 hours of Wayne Coyne screaming into a bucket and intense band arguments.
Music
At War With the Mystics Reissue Unleashes Hundreds of Unlistenable Scraping Sounds
The deluxe At War With the Mystics reissue features 84 discs of feedback, argument tapes, and a megaphone cover of Queen.
Music
Sia Avatar Plans Leaked: Pophouse Memo Details Chandelier Rigging Requirements
Leaked internal memo reveals the chaotic logistics behind the upcoming Sia avatar plans after a $180 million catalog sale.
Music
Hellraiser Game Soundtrack Trial Exposes Peaches Remixes Secrets
Courtroom transcripts reveal the terrifying industry secrets behind the new Peaches remixes featured in the upcoming Hellraiser game.